Are Teenagers Still Children?
In most countries, teenagers between 13 and 17 years old are considered both children and teenagers simultaneously. They are neither infants nor adults but may still be regarded as children based on some medical, cultural, and legal contexts.
The teenage years are a period of adolescence where they experience growth spurts physically, psychologically, socially, and emotionally. They may be past their early and middle childhood stages but are not yet fully in adulthood. Like any neither-here-nor-there situation, it can be a complex and confusing phase for many.
The Transition Journey
Teenage years are a transitory stage of human development, and as with any transition, adjustments and changes can be overwhelming for the teen if not properly guided. While it is the biological nature of humans to develop, the beginning, process, and completion of this developmental stage may differ depending on various factors:
Cultural and Socio-economic
This adolescence stage may also be longer or shorter depending on a culture’s social recognition of it. In some countries, adolescents become adults or socially transition into adult roles like working or starting a family faster. For others, additional responsibilities might be the difference between childhood and adolescence.
Legally, The United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child defines a child as "A human being below the age of 18 years unless, under the law applicable to the child, majority is attained earlier”, ratified by 192 out of 194 member countries.Under this definition, teenagers fall under children and enjoy the rights of being children
The Transition Journey
Teenage years are a transitory stage of human development, and as with any transition, adjustments and changes can be overwhelming for the teen if not properly guided. While it is the biological nature of humans to develop, the beginning, process, and completion of this developmental stage may differ depending on various factors:
Cultural and Socio-economic
This adolescence stage may also be longer or shorter depending on a culture’s social recognition of it. In some countries, adolescents become adults or socially transition into adult roles like working or starting a family faster. For others, additional responsibilities might be the difference between childhood and adolescence.
Legally, The United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child defines a child as "A human being below the age of 18 years unless, under the law applicable to the child, majority is attained earlier”, ratified by 192 out of 194 member countries.Under this definition, teenagers fall under children and enjoy the rights of being children.
Handling Teenagers
Teenage years or adolescence is a critical, sensitive, and vulnerable stage in human development. If you have a teenager and feel unable to deal with their personality and behavior, here are some tips to help you connect and build a solid and meaningful relationship with them.
1. Cultivate Communication
Your teenager is at a sensitive period in life and may be unable to express and share their journey with you. Do not wait for them to open up to you. Reach out to them and create a safe environment where they can speak their minds, ask questions, and be receptive to advice.
Making them feel like their voice doesn't matter will send the wrong message that you don’t value them as a person. This will lead them to seek their validity elsewhere. Remember to be firm with your words and consistent with your principles.
2. Respect Their World
They may still be children, but they are experiencing many things for the first time. Do not add to their confusion by providing baseless information and unnecessary rules. Instead, learn to respect their personal space and allow them to form their own opinions, learn from their mistakes, and realise that there’s a smart and better way of doing things. Many teenagers feel insecure and are prone to peer pressure. Gently guiding them while respecting their individuality is an excellent way to win their trust and obedience.
3. Set Boundaries
Some teenagers test the extent of their capability, causing them to do unwise, even self-destructive things - from cutting classes to bullying or trying an illicit substance. While allowing them to explore and learn is important, tethering them to keep them from ruining their future is your responsibility as a parent or guardian. Setting boundaries and consequences can help train them to become responsible as teenagers, preparing them to be responsible and productive adults.
4. Discipline With Love
Some teenagers feel powerful when they break the rules and go against the tide, it is important to remind them of the consequences and not let them off the hook easily. But as you do so, do not lose your cool and give away your power to control your emotions. Apart from setting a bad example, being angry and antagonistic will only push them further away from you and create a chasm between the two of you. Do not add to the generation gap by building a wall of misunderstanding.
Always explain why you are saying no to a request and why they should follow your rules, patiently and lovingly.
5. Show Empathy
Teenagers often feel misunderstood. Before reacting to their headstrong stance, remember that you were a teenager once wanting your own way. It would be best to show empathy to them before telling them the best way to do things. They will appreciate your advice more when they learn that you understand where they’re coming from based on your shared experience.
Peppering your sound advice with humor can also help relieve tension and create a more open and engaging relationship.
Cherishing Their Teenage Years
Your child will only pass through this stage once, and you can use this period as an opportunity to strengthen your bond and create lasting memories. You can make this experience more delightful for you by finding common ground, learning from each other, enriching each other’s life stage, and inspiring each other to become better as a parent and child.
The key is to not look at your child’s teenage phase as a problem to get over and done with. Instead, look at it as a way to help shape their personality, values, and path by being there for them and making them feel loved and accepted despite their imperfections. Share your life lessons with them so they can learn from your experiences and hopefully carve a better path than you did. With the proper perspective and approach, their teenage years can be exciting and fulfilling for your child and you.
Cherishing Their Teenage Years
Your child will only pass through this stage once, and you can use this period as an opportunity to strengthen your bond and create lasting memories. You can make this experience more delightful for you by finding common ground, learning from each other, enriching each other’s life stage, and inspiring each other to become better as a parent and child.
The key is to not look at your child’s teenage phase as a problem to get over and done with. Instead, look at it as a way to help shape their personality, values, and path by being there for them and making them feel loved and accepted despite their imperfections. Share your life lessons with them so they can learn from your experiences and hopefully carve a better path than you did. With the proper perspective and approach, their teenage years can be exciting and fulfilling for your child and you.
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